The idea of getting a divorce may make you cringe. While you and your spouse agree that it is the best path for your family, it makes you nervous.
Starting over is not easy, and doing so with kids as a single parent is a prospect you never thought possible. You do not want to escalate this splitting up into an all-out war. While you will not agree on everything, you believe you can compromise on some things. Mediation is a process that helps divorcing couples come to reasonable agreements with less stress.
You may not understand the mediation process. Your ideas may come from what you have seen on television or heard from friends who have gone through it. Mediation, simply put, is a way to negotiate a reasonable agreement with less discord. Your attorney may recommend it, or the court may order it.
The court usually chooses a mediator from a pool of candidates. This person is a lawyer who has no personal knowledge of your case. Thus, he or she is impartial and is able to provide an unbiased and realistic approach to your circumstances.
At mediation, you and your attorney speak with the mediator. He or she will ask questions, go over basic information and explain the process. Depending on the mediator’s preferences, you and your ex may not see or engage with each other throughout the negotiations. The mediator may bounce back and forth between the parties. This helps to keep bickering from impeding the progress. Once all parties agree on the terms of the divorce, parenting plan, etc., everyone may come together to go on the record with the final agreement. This becomes the basis for the divorce decree and parenting plan which one of the attorneys will draft, and a judge will sign.
When you do not familiarize yourself with a process, it can seem daunting. Participating in divorce mediation is a much more amicable and low-stress way to end a marriage in a more dignified manner.